


Mother Love

by thereisnowyou



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Canon Universe, Death, M/M, Past Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-08
Updated: 2020-01-08
Packaged: 2021-02-27 15:55:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22169746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thereisnowyou/pseuds/thereisnowyou
Summary: Ian and Mickey talk about the woman in their lives who were barely there but left a lasting impact.
Relationships: Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich
Comments: 2
Kudos: 22





	Mother Love

**Author's Note:**

> Hi folks! this idea just came to me when I was rewatching some older shameless episodes. Might leave it as a oneshot or might add more, let me know what you think!

Ian is just laying there staring at the ceiling and Mickey knows something is up. 

“what are you thinking about?”

“Monica”

“Why the fuck you thinking about her?”

“It’s been like 3 years since she died, and I don’t know that’s just really fucking crazy to me”

Mickey sighs, he knows that Ian fears ending up like Monica and nothing he ever says shakes that fear and he also knows that Monica did a number on all of her kids more than Frank ever did and that the most damage was done to Ian.

Mickey climbed into the bed next to Ian and looked at him, brushing a hair out of his face. Ian smiled and turned to look at Mickey directly. Mickey softened completely looking at Ian.

“Do you miss her?”

Ian didn’t know how to respond to that. He didn’t expect the question and honestly, he didn’t know the answer. 

“I don’t know. Sometimes I feel like I do but then every year when Thanksgiving rolls around I just think about the year that she slit her wrists in the kitchen and how much that fucked all of us up. It was the first time Debs and Carl really got to see what her bipolar was like and god I thought she was gonna fuckin die right then.”

“Jesus shit Ian…”

“It’s complicated, she understood me like no one else did with the bipolar, but she also just encouraged the mania and at the end of the day it just hurt me”

Mickey sighed and kissed Ian’s hair. He knew that his bipolar and his mother were always hanging above Ian, they just didn’t always show like this. Sometimes it was more subtle ways, like how he cringed whenever Frank would say that he was the most like Monica or how he was always asking how someone could love someone like him but never saying exactly what that meant. 

“Do you miss your mom?”

That question rocked Mickey completely. They never talked about his family, he never let Ian ask the questions. He knew shit because of Mandy and of course they talked about how shitty Terry was, but Mickey never ever wanted to talk about his family. That was too hard and too much. Mickey immediately tensed up.

“The fuck you asking questions like that for?”

Ian could feel how Mickey had tensed up and reached for Mickey’s face and gently rubbed his cheek with his thumb. He knew Mickey was guarded about his family, but he loved him and wanted to know everything about him.

“Hey, it’s okay, you can talk about this shit with me”

Mickey softened just a little as e looked into Ian’s puppy dog looking eyes wondering how the hell he got wrapped up into domestic life with a fucking Gallagher.

“I was young when she died like maybe a year older than Franny. I don’t really remember much about her. I remember her and Terry going at it constantly, so much screaming. Then one day I remember climbing into her bed, she was nicer than Terry much more like a real fuckin parent, and she was so fucking cold.”

“Mickey I’m sorry..”

“Many was with me she was 3 maybe 4 and I told her to go to her room and I remember going up to Terry and asking why mommy was so cold and he asked me what the fuck I meant and he went into the room and just started screaming, I think it’s the only time I’ve seen him actually fucking hurt.”

Ian looked at Mickey, his eyes were filled with sadness and he was barely holding I together. He pulled him in closer to him and pressed a kiss into his hair while he could feel Mickey shake a little bit. Eventually Mickey pulled away and looked at Ian.

“How did Monica die?” 

Mickey of course knew she was dead, Ian told him that when they reunited in prison, but he left it at that and Mickey could tell Ian didn’t want him to ask.

“Brain aneurysm, she died the day I was coming back from the Mexican border. Honestly, I was just surprised it wasn’t a fucking overdose she was such a meth head.”

They were both silent for a second before Ian had the courage to ask Mickey more questions

“What was her name?”

“Katarina”

Mickey’s voice was soft, and Ian could tell he hadn’t said her name in a long time

“How did she die?”

“Drug overdose, I think she killed herself to escape Terry honestly. I remember him always fuckin beating her and after she would come and sit with me and Mandy and say “Mommy loves you but she might need to leave soon because she is hurting too much for this world but you will stay” that was always her thing. She was hurting but we would stay, and we would make it. I think she loved us, but she couldn’t do it anymore.”

Ian held Mickey tightly and vowed to make sure that Mickey knew how much he loved him everyday for the rest of their lives.


End file.
